¡Ay, Caramba!

I was in Mexico having lunch with my friend Oscar and wouldn't you know it, there was a clown in the booth next to ours! Just a miscellaneous clown having lunch with her friends, who were not clowns. Of course my eyes were bugging out of my head! I have known Oscar for a while and although we always speak in Spanish, since I have known him so long he understands perfectly my level of Spanish and adjusts his Spanish to mine. I asked him to please ask the clown if I could get a picture with her, he said NOOOOOOO. He thought I was crazy. I begged as how many opportunities do you get like that in life. He still said NOOOOOOO and added again that I was crazy. I had to figure something out and fast!

When our waiter came up I asked in Spanish of the waiter that since I feel my Spanish is poor, would he please ask the clown if I could get my picture with her. He understood perfectly and said he would ask. He left and Oscar rolled his eyes, as if that mattered - you know how many times in my life I have gotten the eye roll from people LOL. Eureka, the waiter returns and tells me the clown said yes! I wanna pee my pants AND my heart is palpitating but I know it will be good to deal with the clown issue once and for all head on - nose to nose I guess would be the appropriate saying.

I go over and in Spanish tell the clown Merry Christmas and thank you for the photo. She says - in PERFECT English - you are welcome honey! My head is swimming!!! The crazy miscellaneous clown in Mexico speaks perfect English - and it gets better. The crazy clown tells me she wants to hold her bible in the picture and pulls out this HOT PINK bible and holds it up - don't believe me then look closely at the picture above. All I can think is that you really should not drink the water in Mexico as it must fuck up your head since this cannot be reality. As it all turns out, the clown was from Vegas (sure why not) and was there with her church on an evangelism mission. So of course now I am really afraid of the clown as I am thinking the crazy miscellaneous English speaking clown in Mexico is going to want to baptism me or something. Turns out she was very sweet. She did invite me to a meeting and gave me some literature - all written in Spanish.

I return to my table and Oscar tells me in Spanish that I am the reason Mexicans think all gringos are nuts. I wish I could disagree but I cannot. I told him it was not me that it was the water in Mexico. He did not buy my claim. Then to top this off - check out the picture one last time - how freaking good do I look in that picture???? Why didn't my picture with Sharlowe that I posted a little bit ago come out that good. Now I am sitting here wondering if I use this picture as my online profile picture what kind of gentleman callers is that going to attract??? Crazy, crazy, crazy -- my world is crazy. And regardless if you say clown or you say payaso - they still scare me.