Drunk Dialing

Paula - congratulations on the arrival of the twins! Michael must be thrilled over the cute little tax deductions that they are. THANK YOU so much for my drunken Happy New Year call!!! I do not care where you are or where I am - if you ever try to let a New Year's Eve go by without getting tanking on White Russians and not calling me to lavish me with love -- I will hunt you down! Have fun - happy new year - I love you more than I could ever express in person or on this silly blog. White Russians or not - you are one of the most endearing persons I have ever known. KEEP CALLING!!!!

In No Particular Order

2009 Resolutions:

1. Do not contact any ex in any way, shape, form or manner.
2. Go to the gym or get exercise at minimum of 3 times weekly, regardless of what else is happening that week.
3. Get healthy – eat fruits and vegetables on a daily basis and this smoking thing has got to stop.
4. Practice Spanish daily – even if it is for 10 minutes a day and try to speak Spanish as often as possible for the practice.
5. Do not buy any tickets to any concerts that you cannot pay for in cash.
6. Pay off your credit cards.
7. Do not go shopping because you are bored.
8. Do not go out drinking more than twice a month.
9. Do not give into to other’s opinions of you! If I am too fat, too old, too mundane, too silly, too stupid, too frivolous, or too anything for you then FUCK YOU.
10. Focus on positive things – real friends, family, productive ways to spend your energy, feed your mind, improve your body, and see the difference.
11. Give up revenge – it is stupid and a waste of precious energy. Living well is the best revenge - albeit it easier said than done.
12. Dwell on what you have not what others have.
13. Keep a clean house and toss out shit. No need to keep old magazines and mail and stupid shit. A clean and neat house is a clean and neat life.
14. Be honest – most importantly with yourself!
15. Live your life – fuck them.

16. Remember to be passionate and forgiving toward yourself everyday.

Key: Post Regular updates on the status of these. Modify as need be. Repeat as often as you can. Keep them visible at all times.

Editors Note: Thank you Joseph for your input on number 16. Especially since it merely echoes the advise both Michelle and Michael have given me separately, "Don't be so hard on yourself".

Lucky Me

Why do I get to be Satan? Fuck that. Fuck all of this. I can go on and post some self pity posting but really what is the use. I am done with that shit and all of this shit as a matter of fact. Everyone is out for their own and because I am too fucking stupid to get that basic idea then I have to deal with the shit. Whatever. I am mad and I am annoyed. It is time for a new year and I am not one for resolutions but am making a list this time round. I am gonna write it down and tape it up on my fridge. I am going to repeat it nightly to myself if I have to. A leopard doesn't it change it spots - that is so clear and evident - but it does not mean it has to eat shit.

Happiness

The kids are great. It was wonderful to see them at Christmas time. I know I am the crazy uncle but they just love me to pieces. How much do I love that. The tell me about their games and schools and all sorts off silly stuff that is the most important stuff in the world. I especially see it with Dianne's kids. My family is not warm and touchy and it is so hard for them to express tenderness. Hell it took me a lifetime and I still got a ways to go. But they hug me and sit on top of me - they love that I am silly like no other adult and speak to them like people and not kids. Cindy's kids too - very much so although they are much warmer in general. But I also ways feel so special with them and we have so many laughs. They love me completely and it makes me happy.

You Have to See

During my Christmas visit I saw Slumdog Millionaire with Dianne and Ted. I was glad because they do not get out very often but moreover I was glad because it was such a great movie. It was clever and brilliant and without a doubt moving and touching. I see firsthand in Mexico how Americans are spoiled and that the world - even right next door - is vastly different. It was a bit harrowing at times but enlightening just the same. Read what reviews you want but it is really just a love story. It is the kinda of movie love that at times seems hardly possible to exist in the real world but I truly believe it does. It is elusive and something to work at and although I do not believe it comes to everyone, I still believe it is possible to find. Love can be that true. Love can be that powerful. But like many other wonderful things it does not mean it is easy. That is the part Americans have trouble with. Sometimes things are not easy and we are owed nothing - even if we work very, very hard. But in the end there is no denying the beauty or power of this movie. Treat yourself, see the world, see this movie.

It was Just a Toy Truck

I was a bit annoyed yesterday and so that elicits one or more of these three things: I shop, I eat or I clean. Luckily yesterday I cleaned and so today I had some stuff to donate Goodwill. I cannot make a deposit without making a withdrawal too so I was poking about the store. I am crazy in that I think life is a giant 3D tv for my sole enjoyment and I like to watch. I saw a handsome young Mexican man and his pretty wife and adorable infant. I made note of it because it pleased me to see such a nice little family. I watched as they went over and over a tonka type truck for little, little kids. The dad's eyes were excited but the mom's were not so keen. Looking to maximize their shopping they stayed with the little outfits and shoes they sorted out of the heaps of stuff in the store.

I got stuck as I tend to do and just kept looking. They walked up to the register and all was very average until I thought that it is only 3 days to Christmas, this is killing me. I walked over and picked up the truck and brought it to the family as they were checking out. I gave it to the cashier to ring with their stuff and then handed the cashier a twenty. I said to the young dad in Spanish, "Merry Christmas to you and your beautiful family." I don't know, it just all happened so fast. He started to say thanks but I put up my hand as his eyes said more thanks than he could ever express in words. And I said in English, "Merry Christmas".

Where Do I Get One of These???

In case any of you are stuck on what to get me for Christmas - here is a pic of what I need. I have looked everywhere for one and cannot find one. I have the perfect spot for it in my house and I would be eternally grateful!