Brought to Tears

A took a short break from the alternating crying and vomiting of this week to watch some tv, as what feels like a golf ball navigates my urethra. Very much to my surprise I finally found on American tv the British tv show my Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. Everyone thinks I am obsessed with Mexico but it really is England that I am obsessed with. If Mexico was 30 minutes south of me and England only 30 minutes north of me -- I swear I would always be in England. My obsession is kinda hard as I do not have BBC on my cable system but I still manage.

I read on a regular basis (ie daily) the UK Guardian and the London Sun. It is a good balance as the Guardian does contain actual articles and writing whereas the Sun is a total gossip rag. I mean rag - it make the National Enquirer seem highbrow. I do not understand why I need to know stuff like this but I am completely up on all the entertainment gossip in England. I completely admit that this is odd and useless as most of the gossip is about people in shows or bands that I have never seen. The Sun is absolutely obsessed with this tv show My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding and the more they wrote about it and printed pictures, well the more obsessed I became.

So there I was clicking when wham the one bright spot in this miserable week is before my eyes as this show I know so much about is on TLC and I finally get to watch an episode ---- oooooooohhhhhhh so worth the wait! It is about Irish travelers and gypsy culture in the UK and it is absolutely beyond words. This culture is so extreme and so extravagant and trashy - I love it. They speak English but their accents are so heavy they have to put in subtitles. The part I love about that is that it is broadcast in the UK like that -- people speaking English that need subtitles for other English speaking people to understand.

Gypsy women from a young age are indoctrinated to know their place in the world is to become a wife, mother and a housewife and rarely is that mold broken. Since this is the cornerstone of their being they go all out with these elaborate dresses to attract a male. They are literally human versions of birds that have amazing plumes to attract mates. I will admit their taste strictly falls in the realm of boulevard walking ladies of the night but then they say things like, "I need to look good. God wants me to look good. God is happy when I look hot". It is almost too much to take but for at least for a moment I am less focused on my kidney that feels like it is going to burst and more focused on my head which feels like it is going to burst.

To top it all off they have this incredibly high standard of morals. Sex before marriage is absolutely out of the question as it brings shame to the family and you never bring shame to the family. The girls cannot even have cell phones as they are a path to temptation. I wanted to put some pictures of the dresses or outfits but you just need to either watch the show or google image it. You just need to.