Precious Moments

So it is not all doom and gloom and woe is me. In addition to all the tv I have been watching as of late - I spend a lot of time on youtube although it just creates so many questions for me - mostly like, where the hell do people get these videos to post???

I know you think I say it all the time but this is utterly and easily one of my most favorite songs ever! It is impossible not to be as it is so immaculate. Seriously I cannot count high enough to tell you how many times I have watched this video.

It starts off fuzzy which initially was upsetting to me until I realized that the fuzziness is just 70's special effects and then I adored the fuzziness. Then these three women could not imaginably be anymore beautiful. The make-up, eyebrows, wigs, gowns, shoes - these are sexy women. Of course I noticed how they all had their gowns draped perfectly the same over their legs and I just drooled over that touch BUT then they start to rotate in synchronization!!! The first time I noticed I swear my jaw dropped. The point at which I knew truly this was a direct work of god's hand is that THEY are moving the chairs - not a machine. Hence the reason why they all have their one leg so perfectly covered as to not distract that they are moving the chairs. There is a reason for everything in this universe.

To top all the nuttiness off, because I watched it so many times I have a zillion questions? First on the list is did you see the blonde lady in the audience smoking and everyone drinking at banquet tables??? It is imperative that I know where the hell is this dinner club and moreover, how do I get a ticket?!?

What Are Words For...

I have a friend and he is married and has a baby, beautiful home, and both he and his with have very good paying jobs. This friend needed to talk because a male friend of his is getting married and it is extremely upsetting to my friend. Upsetting because he likes his friend - a lot. That is a bit confusing.

Then a guy I worked with over 15 years ago contacted me out of the blue. When we worked together he was married to a woman and yet always screwing around on her with guys. She found out because he gave her an STD! At the time he had no one to speak with so he came out to me and told me all about it. I gave advice but flashback to this week and he is still married to the same woman and yet now has two children. He is in the grips of a self admitted, very tough mid-life crisis because he is so bitter over the choice he made and feels trapped.

I have another friend that wanted to talk this week because he although he loves his wife the prime motivator for him marrying her when he did, was to get his papers. He got his papers and now three years into it and he is miserable with her. He actually was crying as he spoke to me.

You know, I want to be positive. I want to imagine it speaks highly of me to be so trusted as a confidant and a friend. I cannot be positive though. In the midst of all this, I take pills to forget my own worries and to sleep at night. When I do finally feel sleepy I go and lay down in utter darkness and my only thought is that I want everything to stop. I focus on the sound of the clock to overcome the noises in my own head. As I hear the seconds tick away once it is the only audible sound in my black universe - I think to myself that if I can stop the sound well then I will have frozen time and everything will stop and I won't feel anything. I do everything within my mental capacity to stop it and it hasn't stopped yet.

The photo on this post is some actor in the 5th season of the British tv show Skins. I do not know his name but this episode I watched was all about him and he looks just like my friend that got married for papers. I have posted pictures on my blog of that friend before - you can scroll through if you are curious enough to compare.

I watch a lot of tv now - visual valium. I don't know where I am going with this post. Answers are such ephemeral things. As soon as you get one it evaporates and I start focusing on the ticking of the clock again.

Thoughts Swirling in My Head

Today I was thinking of my father. He is at home now with my mother. I speak with him but it is hard. He is not a man of many words but I know it is important to talk with him. I know he enjoys it but does not express it. Sometimes he is with it and sometimes not at all. Makes me wonder about his recovery process as he did have a huge surgery. It will take a while. I speak with my family a lot but I still worry because I cannot see and judge for myself.

The other thought kicking around in my head is my brother-in-law John. His birthday was yesterday and he turned 45. I sent him well wishes of course but then was thinking about him. I met John back when I was 20 and worked at Building 19 with my two sisters. I am not just patting myself on my back but everyone knows I was endowed with the personality factor in my family (among other things wink wink). So I was actually friends first with him. Even way back then John was a great guy so I introduced him to my sister and the rest is history. That's all great but what I keep thinking about is that John has now been in my life for over 25 years. For more than half our lives we have known each other and I am still so glad I know him and that he is my brother-in-law plus dad to some of my wonderful nieces and nephews. So I was thinking about this and sent him a message to let him know. It is important for me to say things like that. Well a few moments later my sister called me wanting to know what the hell I did now. I am sweet but we all know I have a mischievous side. Well John is a big softy and it seems I made him cry. Ah, he is silly albeit a good man. And there is another reason for me to say I am a lucky one!

Return of the G-Guy

I am back. And this pun is supposed to be funny. Do you get it? Jedi - G-guy, my first initial? Pretty weak huh? Oh I know. I do not know why the delay. I have plenty to say but my head is just kinda twisted. I am going to catch up now. I have a stuff to say - good bad and indifferent and I love my blog. So as the force returns to me - stay tuned.

Lady Freaking Who?

This is from 1979 folks. Cracks me up how people believe everything so new today is actually new. Check out that outfit! Plus I just love this song. Even funnier that I just had to break my silence to post this.

PS You know I just watched this video again. I love the song of course but this video is just mind blowing. It's 1979, over 30 years ago, and yet this is more outrageous than anything that Lady Gaga could whip up - even having worn a meat dress. Kids just a word from your elders - the future is ours because we made it! LOL

I Love Cards

I got this Christmas card from my niece and it was my favorite of this year. I did not send cards this year a bit of a combination of lack of inspiration, time and attitude. And although this card is handmade but not by my niece, I could not love it anymore if she had made it. I love it because my niece faithfully writes me and she knows I love cards and so she got this one specially for me. We have this connection and then she reinforced it knowing how much I would enjoy this card and I did. She is wonderful.

I posted a picture before of Sharlowe, my friend from my weight loss group and I just love her. I like most everyone but when I love someone - it is so evident. Not only is she just awesome but she makes cards too. Today I got home to this homemade Happy New Year card. I was thrilled of course and then I read it. It made me feel so good. She talked about how happy she and the group are that I joined and that I am part of it. She said she is proud of my accomplishment but best of all she said, "All the best to you, Scott. You are so awesome in how you treat everyone around you.". That made me feel so good, so special. What a wonderful thing for someone to tell me. I feel so good.

Happy New Year

2011 is history and I am very happy about that. No anger - no regret and it will probably stand out than most years previous but it is time for a new year and new things so 2012 I am happy you are here and ready! I will get blogging again soon. Wish you all the best and much love.